Becoming his Monster Read online

  “I asked for help, something you couldn’t be bothered to fucking do. You think you have to do everything alone, but you don’t. So I did what you fucking couldn’t do.” Violet eyes clashed with midnight ones, glowing as his hair rose as power thrummed in the air, biting my flesh as if I was being shocked a multitude of times. The mist darkened until I felt smothered by it, which terrified me since I literally didn’t need air to live. “I had no idea what he would do to her, but I did know she would die. That she would die as you watched it unfold. I did what I had to do to prevent an all-out fucking war, and that is exactly what is coming. Her little stunt, and taking away your ex set Lucifer off; he’s started something we cannot stop.”

  I couldn’t move, couldn’t blink. The others had remained on their knees, heads bowed as he spoke. I could feel the power in the area growing out of control. Sweat trickled down my spine, between my breasts, and the entire time, Persephone watched me with inhuman eyes that noted the discomfort. There was something gentle in the way she looked at me, an understanding that I wasn’t sure I wanted to see. I was Hades’s bitch! My body trembled as panic started to take hold, and then something comforted me, soothing magic that eased my nerves and bathed my body in a chilled embrace. I thanked her without saying a word, moving my lips as she continued to calm my response.

  “I didn’t ask you to save her!”

  “You’d have let her fucking die?” Hades shouted right back at him. The earth trembled around us, lightning rocked through the sky followed by loud claps of thunder.

  “She’d have come back!” Lucian raged, and the wind picked up, whipping my hair against my face. His hands exploded into blue flames as souls danced and slithered around him, forming armor as he continued to scream. It was getting fucking freaky. My senses were overwhelmed, my nerves fried to the point that even Persephone and her magic couldn’t soothe the panic building inside of me. “Now when she dies, there’s nothing to save!”

  “She never existed outside of magic,” Hades said softly as his magic seemed to dissipate from the air around us. “She would have been gone forever had I not fed her the sliver of a soul from the River Styx. Had Nyx not added the night into her and brought her back at my request, she’d have simply ceased to exist or became a mindless body controlled by the seal she carried within her. Lena was created of no more than magic mixed with a sliver of Katarina’s soul. Everything that you admired or loved of Katarina was eradicated to become her, to lure you to your death. Once Katarina had melded her soul together, Lena would have been a vacant creature who had no mind of her own. She wouldn’t have even known who you were anymore, Lucian. They intended to keep her that way until your child was born. Unleashing it upon the world, which by the way, she fucking prevented by no small miracle. I had no idea they were aware of my part, and if she hadn’t had the strength she did, she’d have died in vain. Nyx was watching that night, aware of the favor I’d asked of her and found your little witchling worthy. So she stands before you on her own merit. She earned the respect of a Goddess who respects no one, on her own. That is a feat unheard of in this day and age, all things considered.”

  “If you’d broken the wards, she wouldn’t have had to die in the first place.”

  “Yes, she did. Your son was the Harbinger. I let you see her death echo, the one she is cursed to relive every full moon, the price she pays to come back to you. She said his name correctly. He’d have been that and worse if he’d been born to her. He wouldn’t have stood a chance. You think Lucifer hadn’t told half of Hell what he was planning to do with your unborn son? He made sure you’d have to kill him or watch him die. One of the twins wasn’t leaving that circle alive, he’d thrown that around enough that I knew which one he’d take out to hurt you the most. Once I knew Katarina was part of his plan, the one you’d bred with seemed more like the one destined to die. I told you to find something soulless to love so that we didn’t have to watch you hurt again and again, and so I took it upon myself to make it so. Now Lena has an army at her back, one she will control and fight with beside you, unlike Katarina who was always against you. I have Cerberus at my gates, and now you have Lena and her army guarding yours.”

  “How did you create her?” he demanded, his fists clenching and unclenching at his sides.

  “I tasted her, pushing a sliver of a lost soul into hers. Not enough to be controlled by the evil she houses, not unless she decides to let it. Your woman is stronger than most, brother. She is fierce, even though she be little. Nyx did the rest. There’s something else you should know. Lucifer is aware she is alive, and he is free now. He will be hunting her as soon as he is back on his feet and able to do so, which brings us to this next pickle. There’s a way to bring her back, but she’d have to choose to do it freely, she’d have to want it enough to follow through with it, and it would bind her to him as much as she is now bound to you.”

  “How?” he asked, the one word a thunderous boom in the night as everyone else held their breath.

  “She would have to take the soul her sister grows inside her womb. She’d have to kill it the moment it took its first breath, murdering it for its life source. She’d be human again, whole. But she would be part of him until she took her dying breath.”

  “No, never,” I uttered as anger bubbled up. “I’d rather die than be attached to that monster.”

  “And you’re not one now?” Lucian seethed.

  I flinched and recovered before I laughed softly. “Afraid of me, Lucian, or are you afraid that I am immune to you now, like this?”

  “I’m not afraid of you, but darkness only grows. Eventually, you will not be Lena; you’ll be whatever the fuck they created you to be.”

  “I created her to be yours,” a soothing voice whispered through the night, as inky and beautiful as the woman who seemed to appear out of thin air. “She will always know you, and what she once was. She is revenge, chaos, and beautiful disaster. The night in her veins is pure, and yes, it occasionally comes out of her eyes as memories. She is not evil, but she is not of the light as she once was, either. Does that bother you, Lucian?”

  “Nyx,” he uttered as he took a step closer towards her and then stopped. “You did this to her.”

  “I did, and I am not sorry for it. She is a warrior and the rage she felt was beautiful and intoxicating. Her sacrifice was heartfelt and pure. Who else would be better to guard you than someone willing to end her own existence to save you from pain?” She stopped in front of me, touching my cheek with her hand, and emotion stirred to life vividly, as if the world had been bathed in a kaleidoscope of beautifully-woven colors that started and ended with her.

  “Mother,” I whispered even though I hadn’t wanted to. I felt her in my bones, in the darkened mist within me, I felt her. As if she was a part of me, my creator.

  “Ignore him; he gets pissy when he hasn’t eaten enough souls, love. You’re utterly perfect in your imperfect way as he once said you were before. She is, isn’t she, Luc?” she laughed, and the hair on my nape rose as the name slipped out. “Oh, calm your tits. He was Luc first, before Lucy’s dad ever even lay on that whore of a mother he sinned with,” she said with a frown as my mouth dropped into an even deeper frown. “Don’t look at me like that; your God was a sinner before he was a saint, but then aren’t we all? Did you really think angels just came to be? He lay down in that Garden of Eden and created life with a serpent. Imperfect life, and then grew bored of them and created humans.” She shrugged. “And so your world was created. And now you know how the humans were created and in whose image. No, sweetling, we are not his. You’re giving it away here,” she said as she tapped her head. “We’re connected so that I know if you are ever in trouble.”

  “Get the fuck outta my head!” I shouted, scaring even me as my mouth worked to speak, finally.

  “You’ll get used to it,” she retorted. “Anywho, you’re welcome,” her words were pointed at Lucian. �
�Hades was correct, I did find her worthy. The war is brewing ever so closely, and we needed what Lena would become on our side, what with your unwillingness to join us in it. Now that she will be forced to wage it beside me, so too will you. Those who kneel are hers now, her army. One created with an iron will for revenge and hatred. If she chooses to take the unborn soul of Lucifer’s child into her body, she can choose to free them of her control. If not, she will lead them. She is your gift from me, for what you have sacrificed to prevent this war, but it is coming. The only hope we have to win is keeping the last gate from opening. Enjoy, brother mine.”

  “You’re a God?” I asked, turning to stare at Lucian.

  “No, I’m not.”

  “Then what are you?” I snapped. “What am I?”

  “You, my dear, are a primordial being now,” she chirped as she strolled towards Synthia and sniffed. “You’re new, newly born.”

  “I am daughter of Danu,” she said stiffly. “And not for dinner, but I do love the brands you wear.”

  “They’re not brands; they are strands of the night woven into my soul. Much like Lena has, but where I can control mine, she has yet to learn and so it shows from where her soul used to shine. She will master it quickly, as she has learned to harness her powers and sprout her wings.”

  “She’s a harpy,” Synthia countered.

  “I am Nyx; I do not create Harpies. I am Destiny’s mother. I am the mother of darkness and death, not women who resemble nightmarish chickens. Now, have fun my little Furies and don’t kill too many creatures.”

  “Furies?” I uttered through clenched teeth.

  “You’re created for revenge, chaos, and that is what it will take to close the gates that have opened. Unless, of course, you prefer the chaos of this new world?”

  “I’m a Fury, like the mythical creature?”

  “You are,” she chuckled as the night enveloped her and she vanished. “And you’re his now, forever. Be gentle to him, for he has been through hell without you.”

  “I’m not his,” I growled, but the mist cleared, and the midnight sky hovered above once more. I stared up at the multitude of stars that blinked and burned out, sailing across the sky in a vibrant display as they fell. Her throaty laughter was the only indication she’d even heard my refusal.

  Chapter 14

  A Fury!

  I was created from chaos and darkness. Just what I never wanted to be, and yet it felt right. It felt good, and I was the leader of an army? I felt like I should be miffed or upset, but I wasn’t. Instead, I felt as if I was where I was supposed to be.

  “Follow me,” Lucian ordered, and I turned on him with a mocking grin marring my lips. I put my tongue in my cheek as I watched his eyes narrow on mine. “You’re not that fucking badass, little girl. You want to go toe-to-toe with me? I fucking dare you to try it.”

  “You think I wouldn’t?” I asked, and I tried to attack him. Nothing fucking happened. I was literally unable to do anything. Before, I’d been able to hurt him, but I hadn’t felt the burning need to obliterate him, either. Just to make him feel my pain.

  “Bound to me means you cannot hurt me,” he laughed coldly.

  “The fuck! What the fuck, Hades?” I demanded, swinging my eyes to his.

  “Sorry, but he’s right. You cannot hurt him, not with the intent to really harm him. Other things, though…I didn’t take away everything, sweet one. Just the inability to actually hurt or harm him,” he chuckled as he watched me.

  I frowned, and stared down at my hand and then back towards Lucian who watched me with a burning need bathed in his midnight depths. This was crap! I wanted to fucking murder him, and yet I couldn’t touch him as the anger radiated through me.

  “Don’t encourage him, husband,” Persephone warned. “She has suffered enough at the hands of others; she should at least be able to hurt him back. She lost a child, something we have to know the loss of,” she uttered as her hand slipped to her slim belly.

  “You’d have to fuck me to have a child, wife,” he snapped coldly.

  “Oomph,” I snorted. “I’m sorry.”

  “For what, dear?” she asked. “I chose not to have a child with him who would be stuck in that miserable Underworld for eternity. The Gods would never have let him come with me when I left for the time I’m allowed. I wouldn’t leave my child there so he could corrupt it.”

  “You think I’d corrupt him any more than you and your family would?” Hades asked, his eyes glowing with his anger.

  “Okay…we’re going now,” I said, turning to grab Lucian’s hand as I rushed us towards the Guild, pulling him with me. That wasn’t something I intended to process, let alone get in the middle of.

  “Now you’re in a hurry to get me alone?” he chuckled.

  “Fuck off,” I retorted as I continued to move us towards the entrance of the Guild. I wanted away from the arguing Gods, away from their massive power that sent chills racing through my body.

  “How about we do this?” he asked. One minute I’d been pulling him behind me, and the next I was in the room with him alone.

  “How did you do that?” I asked as I swayed on my feet as I struggled to maintain an upright position. My body thrummed with his power, unable to catch up with the way he’d moved us through the Guild.

  “Magic,” he replied as he tilted his head, staring at me with a hungry gaze. He stepped closer, stalking me until my back skimmed the wall, and his hands trapped me there. I stared up as his mouth touched my cheek and then pulled away to smile down at me with a predatory, hungry gaze.

  “Stop it,” I ordered as his mouth lowered, brushing against mine without kissing me.

  “Stop what?”

  “Stop looking at me like I’m a freak! I heard you, you know. I get that you don’t like me like this, but I won’t bind myself to that monster. I won’t do what he said just to get out of this.”

  “You mean take the life of a child,” he amended. “I’m willing to do it for you.”

  “Just because she’s his daughter doesn’t mean she’s evil,” I answered as my forehead creased and my eyes closed. “Lucian, what the hell is going on? What the hell are you that Gods intervened and saved me from death?”

  “You aren’t ready for that, even after everything you’ve been through, you’re not ready to accept what I am yet,” he disclosed as he lifted his hand, and I ended up flying through the air without warning, only for him to reappear in front of me, shoving me to the bed as if I was weak. “When you’re ready to accept me, I’ll tell you what I am and why they chose to save you.”

  “But you don’t trust them or why they did this to me, do you?” I asked as I stared up, cupping his cheek with my palm as I watched him. His heat undid me, sending a shock that registered in my core, unraveling me without warning.

  “Gods do nothing for free, Lena, ever.” His mouth lowered to mine, brushing the flesh as heat rippled through them. I rolled away, noting he’d let me create distance between us. I couldn’t think with his mouth that close to mine, and his body, that fucking body still did things to me that the simplest of touches sent fireworks exploding through my system.

  “It’s not going to be that easy,” I muttered as I pulled my legs to my chest and leaned against the wide, cloth-covered headboard of the bed. “You got me killed.”

  “I warned you plenty of times to stay away from me. You should have listened. Not that it would have saved you from me.”

  “I tried to stay away from you, I couldn’t,” I argued as I stared into the turbulent storm brewing in his nighttime depths. “I was like a moth to the flame and I ended up charred, didn’t I? You thought you could protect me, silly boy, but you’re the one who ended my life as surely as if you’d wielded that blade. I was dead the moment you kissed me and just too stupid to realize it.”

  “You were put in this game by Katarina and L
ucifer, never by me. I’ve never used an innocent life to lure her to me. You were as much a surprise to me as I was to you. You were something I couldn’t stay away from, and even when I tried, I couldn’t stay away from you. If you think I’m letting you go again, I assure you, I will not. Losing you once was enough, Lena.”

  “You chose her! I remember it, you calling her to you. You didn’t want me, you wanted her.” Tears slipped free, running down my cheeks as I scrubbed my face, hiding the memories.

  “I called out to her to protect you and the child you carried, yes! I’d have told her anything she wanted to hear. I’d have left with her too if it meant for one fucking second that you would have lived. I begged her to come to me, to save you. I had no idea you would go to them, nor could I break through the wards to get to you. I didn’t even know I had a son because you decided to keep him from me. And why didn’t you tell me? Afraid I wouldn’t accept him, or were you just planning to hide him from me?”

  “So you wouldn’t hurt as I had to,” I answered as I closed my eyes and leaned my head back against the softness of the bed frame. I swallowed hard as I felt his eyes burning my flesh. “I knew he was doomed, and that my only choice as his mother would be to end his life. You didn’t deserve to know of him. I asked if you wanted children, and you said you couldn’t have them and dismissed me. I told you I loved you and what did you do? Do you remember?”

  “I left, because loving me is a death sentence and look at how well that worked out for you.” He grabbed my legs, pulling me to him until I was forced to fight or curl into the heat of his body. “I pushed you away because it was the only fucking way I knew to protect you from this happening. I didn’t want this for you, even if I had to let you go to prevent it. You should have come to me, told me what was happening. I’d have destroyed worlds to save you. To save him,” he uttered thickly.

  “And I would have lost my sister, and you’d have been forced to kill our son to protect me and everyone else from the monster he would have become,” I whispered tightly. “I was going to lose the fight and I knew it, but I wasn’t letting her have you either.”